Do my wrists look thinner to you?

(I don't condone weight loss drugs at all.  This commercial was just to prove my point later on.  I've never used this drug, I don't plan on using this drug, disclaimer, disclaimer, disclaimer.)

I definitely should have started this blog when I first decided the squish needed to go.  It was much more entertaining to hear me bitch about all the places I wanted to lose weight and where I actually was losing weight.  First of all, I really only want to lose two places: the back squish and the thigh squish.  I thought running and doing core exercises  would help with that, right?  Nope.  First place I lose weight?  My boobs.

Now, in high school, I was pretty tiny up top.  I was tiny everywhere, neck down, I could easily be confused for a boy.  I moved to Boston and I all the sudden got boobs.  No joke, one of my happiest moments was getting fitted for new bras at Vicki's and being told I was a D.  A D!!!  I won't lie, I dug the new girls.  I was squishy, but my ta-tas rocked.  ANYWAY.  I decided I needed to drop this handful of lbs, and started going to the gym, eating better, drinking less.  Soon I started noticing these awesome D bras I bought now had space in them.  My pants didn't fit better...but I was definitely noticing a loss in the ladies.

And it was a loss, let me tell you.  I'm barely a C now, and I STILL have this unpleasantness between my belly button and my knees.  What kind of cruel joke is that?  "Oh sure, Judith, we'll let you lose weight, but we'll take it from the one place you didn't want to lose any weight, and we'll just make you work even harder to lose it where you want to."  Evil weight loss bastards.

I'm not kidding. My ankles are thinner, my face is thinner, you obviously know what happened to the girls.  I even think my wrists are thinner, and yet I can't manage away these last chunks of jiggle.  It's a cruel cosmic joke.

On another note, I'm really missing bacon.